It’s Back to School Time – Missing My Baby
Written by Lisa Giordano
Fall is often a hard season for loss families. With all the excitement and busyness of back-to-school time, loss families are not sharing in the joy. Loss families are painfully aware that their baby/child is not heading back to school and their hearts ache as they would give anything to have their child with them and amongt the kids going to school. Loss families are very aware of how old their heavenly baby would be is they were still with them. “Little Megan would have been 5 and starting kindergarten this year”.
In addition to back-to-school time, Thanksgiving and Christmas are only a few months away. The holidays are difficult times for loss families also, as they are painfully aware of who is no longer with them.
How do loss families cope with these feelings? How can friends and family support the loss families in these seasons? It is important to loss families that their heavenly children are remembered and that their names are spoken out loud. Here are a few suggestions to support those dear to you who have lost a baby or child.
Send a thoughtful note or a text “I know back to school time is hard for you as you miss your Nathan. I am thinking of you and praying for you this season. Nathan is precious and he will never be forgotten.”
Ask about their heavenly baby/child, parents want to talk about them. “What is your best memory of your Nathan? Why did you choose Nathan for his name?
Remember significant dates such as birthdays or heavenly birthdays and reach out.
Gift them a remembrance item such as a personalized remembrance print. A thoughtful gift such as a family tree which represents all the family, including the heavenly children. The family tree is also helpful for the earthly children to remember and understand they have heavenly brothers or sisters.
The main idea in supporting a loss family is not to forget, especially over time. Remember with them, say their child’s name, reach out. Some people don’t know what to say or do but saying or doing nothing is hurtful and there are always little ways you can show your support and love.
Lisa Giordano is Christ follower. She is a member of Joy Community Fellowship of Williamstown in NJ. She is married to Greg and they are blessed with 5 children here on earth and 8 babies in heaven. She is a stay home mom and homeschools her children. She works part-time from home in her shops that create personalized remembrance prints for families who have lost babies. She considers it a great privilege to come alongside hurting families and care for them and bring them comfort. You can go to her shop here. She also has a ministry called Heavenly Birthdays where monthly lists of heavenly babies’ names are recorded and the loss families are prayed for on their child's heavenly birthday. She also offers a number of free personalized digital files for loss families and families experiencing infertility.
